Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Attitude Adjustment. // Kara W.

I have come to the realization that my attitude is terrible. I have been ticked off, pissed off and angry for the last year. My attitude has compromised my relationships with almost everyone in my life. I finally made peace with some of my demons-didn’t completely exorcise them from my life, but calmed them down. 
Here was what was holding me back.

(1) My job-I am very resentful that my librarian job was budget-cut and I am back in the classroom again. I whined, griped, complained, and missed as much work as I could last year (it wasn’t the kids, I promise, I LOVE my students). This year I started off thankful that I have a job with wonderful people and awesome students, do I miss the library, yes, will I continue to try to get back in the library HELL YES.

(2) Weight Loss and motivation. In 2009 I lost 80 pounds in 10 months by diet and exercising only. The weight literally melted off, but I did have to work at it. I used the Medifast program, where you weigh in weekly, meet individually with a counselor and eat 5 of their meals a day and one healthy meal of your own cooking. No bread, sugar, milk, fruit, or cheese could be eaten. It was very restrictive, but extremely effective. I also began running at that time. It helped with the weight loss. Since having my baby and adjusting to the new job I have tried Medifast three times and failed each time. I can’t do that restrictive (and expensive of a diet), but then I get mad when I don’t drop 5-8 pounds in a week. I joined Weight Watchers 7 weeks ago; the first week I GAINED a half pound. I was frustrated but I kept on trucking and third week I lost 4.8 pounds, while eating bread, fruit, cheese and milk-take THAT Medifast. However, I did learn some valuable lessons with Medifast. First, I learned that I actually like vegetables and second I learned that portion control is key. So I have decided that it is OKAY to NOT lose a whole lot of weight in a week, as long as I am eating healthily and exercising. I have lost a total of 10 pounds in 7 weeks, not a whole lot, but it is something.

(3) Being a “new” mother. I have a 17-year old and 17 month old. Having a baby at 36 is not the same as 19. I am way more tired and have way more going on in my life. We live very far away from family, and have NO help outside of our daily baby sitter. No date nights and no sleepovers at Grandma’s. The first time I had so much help, there was fighting over who got to watch my oldest son and if I needed “alone” time all I had to do was ask. I get no alone time now, none whatsoever. No pedicures, no shopping and very very rarely a girls’ night out (like 4 times in the last year). I have a DVR full of my favorite shows that never get watched because I don’t have the time. Finding time to exercise with all of this is a challenge and right now I am not doing so hot. I will keep trying though.

(4) The running….oh running. At one point in my life, it gave me no greater joy than to lace up my sneakers and go. It is the best therapy out there, hands down. Setting race goals and beating them was such an awesome feeling. Now, I have had to rethink my ability and my time constraints. I can’t go out and run 5 miles in under an hour. I can barely run 3.1 in under 50:00, but once again it is okay. I am out there getting it done. 
  
Kara

For more on Kara's journey, check out her personal blog, Run, Baby, Run!

3 comments:

  1. I have JUST been going through this as well. Looking back on 2012 and realizing how many things in life I had the wrong attitude about or I let affect me too much and didn't stop it....it turned me into a total bitch.

    2013 is going to be the year of a major attitude adjustment and re-building my life. Good luck on making peace yourself. =)

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  2. Good for you, on so many levels!!! .. having a good attitude in itself is a huge step!!!

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  3. You can do it. It's so hard for us moms. I'm proud if you for trying. You will get back to where you were before. Patience, and determination. You got this you can do it!

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