Monday, August 26, 2013

365 days later..... // Nikki P.

July 31, 2012. I let a co-worker talk me into joining a weight loss challenge full of strangers. I hesitated each time she mentioned it because 1) I have a huge fear of failure and 2) I didn’t want a bunch of strangers knowing how much I weighed.
I had been attempting to lose weight since the birth of my child 18months prior without huge success.  I had gone 8 months losing and gaining the same 5lbs. This meant I was still 18-23lbs above my pre-pregnancy weight. June 2012, I made up in my mind I was going to lose 10lbs before my July 1st vacation. I failed. But that failure was private. Now, I was being asked to publicly declare my weight and my intention to do something about it. The only thing that pushed me to try was anonymity.  I didn’t have to use my real name. So, right before the clock struck 12 on the last night to register, I joined the FitCamp and put my name on the spreadsheet.
That decision was the best decision I have made in a long time. I am sitting here tearing up as I type. I am so incredibly thankful for this group. I am positive, I would not have made it this far without these ladies.
Camp Counselor asked us once to use 3 words to describe our experience in the group. My words were desire, drive and determination. I have the desire to reach goal, the drive to do what it takes and the determination to push through the “finish.”
You ladies have given me a desire to discover new strengths. I read and think, “hmmm, I should try that.”  You have given me the desire to reach and maintain a healthy weight. You have given me the desire to be stronger and faster.  I would have easily settled for walking at 4.0 on the treadmill. But I read your workouts and challenge myself to push a little more, increase the incline, increase the speed. You have given me drive to push a little harder and a little longer. Heck, I don’t want to get up at 4:30. I don’t want to always go to the baseball game in workout clothes. But I squeeze it in, when I can. You have given me the determination to keep going when success seems impossible. You have given me the determination to focus on the positive and to keep moving forward.  I may not have the desire, drive or determination every day, but one is enough to get me through. So thank you for your gift.
With your help, I have lost 70lbs in 365days. I have gone from a XXL to a medium and from a 18w/20 to a 10. It makes me proud and it makes me scared. I am not safe. Every day poses challenges. I must continue to make good choices and sacrifices.  The sacrifices of sleep, indulgences and even my lunch break are the things that have helped. I would love to lose another 15-30lbs. But the pressure is off. I am smaller than I thought was possible. I weigh 10lbs less than I thought I would actually achieve. 

Small changes, big results, trust the process.
Love,
Nikki P.
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